


I'd Never Like Her

by Sinfulkyman



Category: South Park
Genre: F/F, Fem!kyman, but the events are similar to season 21, they're girls, they're like 17
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-23
Updated: 2018-11-23
Packaged: 2019-08-28 04:25:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16716559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sinfulkyman/pseuds/Sinfulkyman
Summary: Erica struggles with her sexuality after a rough break up with her boyfriend.





	I'd Never Like Her

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is one of my first fics! I'm not the best writer, but I hope you enjoy!

It was only a matter of time before Erica and her boyfriend, Henry Turner, broke up. They definitely were not a good pair for each other, in fact their entire relationship was pretty toxic, but Erica just needed someone to distract her. Without him to keep her mind off of  _her_ , her mind plagued her with those thoughts that she hated. Her soft red curls, her grass green eyes, those gorgeously soft bubblegum pink lips, her mind just drifted to those thoughts without her permission. How it would feel to press her own lips against those soft thin lips, how it would feel to have their bodies pressed together as they passionately kissed each other, and how it would feel to be able to run her fingers along her soft skin, pressing sweet kisses to her bare body. Her heart fluttered at the thought of it, but she  _wasn't_ a lesbian. Not at all. It wasn't like she had a problem with lesbians or anything she supported two of her lesbian classmates who had been together since fourth grade, but her? No. Absolutely, one hundred percent only attracted to guys. She couldn't be a lesbian. Sure, her friends and others seemed accepting of the two lesbians in her grade, but what would they think of  _her_ being a lesbian?  _"It's okay to be a lesbian, but none of the girls here would be attracted to you." "Don't stare at us in the locker room, fatass." "What girl would like a fat bitch like you?" "You're ugly and you have a terrible personality, I would **never** go out with a bitch like you." _The idea of being hated even more swirled in her mind and made her feel sick. She knew people hated her, even her own friends. As much as her false confidence told people otherwise, she  _knew_ she was hated, she was just too afraid to accept and admit it. Even if others seemed accepting, her mind had convinced her that the girls in her grade would be  _disgusted_ if they found something like that out, though she wasn't a lesbian so it didn't matter anyways. She figured that ~~the girl she liked,~~ Kylie Broflovski would have the worst reaction, since she seemed to hate Erica's guts. It didn't matter anyways, since she  _wasn't_ a lesbian. She mostly got all those "bad" thoughts out in her private journal, which she kept at home and only brought to school when her thoughts were incredibly frequent. It usually wasn't too bad, though at school she had to see the girl who made her feel this way and first sparked these feelings and thoughts. Her pretty face, her slim body, her cute perky a cups, her soft perky butt, she was incredibly gorgeous, though this was just jealousy of course, since she definitely wasn't a lesbian. When she went home she usually spent a few minutes writing her thoughts in the journal she kept, writing down things like how fluffy her soft curls looked that day, how she wore a cute outfit, or just general feelings that she felt while looking at the other girl. She also occasionally sketched or doodled the redhead, sometimes accidentally staring at her while trying to memorize her face so she could draw it. It was a really good way to get out all of her feelings, since she probably would've burst by now if she had to keep in all her feelings and thoughts. Still, she was in deep denial that these feelings meant anything, knowing that she might be a lesbian, though she was so deep in denial that any thought that she could be anything other than straight was blocked from her mind. To prove that she was as straight as possible, she'd force herself to watch hetero porn, though she could barely last one video without being utterly disgusted by any penis on screen. Despite her disgusted reaction to any male genitalia, she was still denying any possibility of being a lesbian. Every potentially gay thought that crossed her mind was denied, which wasn't exactly healthy. The small little cupid that her mind made up, Cupid Me, even told her that she was in heavy denial and should just follow her heart, though she simply ignored her own mind telling her what she was, not wanting to be a lesbian. She brought her journal to school more and more often, needing to get her thoughts out more and more. It got to the point where she just kept it in her backpack. In reality, she was just afraid. Afraid of coming out, afraid of what people would think, afraid of the girl she loved rejecting her. Sadly, those fears came true. At some point, she had lost her journal at school, a senior finding it and spreading the contents of it around. Her deepest, most personal thoughts were floating around the school for anyone to read. She wasn't aware of what happened until she began getting odd looks in the hallway and one of her friends, Kenna McCormick, had informed her of what happened. She quickly checked her bag once she was told, not finding her journal in there. She felt more nauseous than she had ever felt in her life, Kylie seeming to avoid her like the plague that day. She felt like she was dying, leaving school early and going home, sobbing to herself for what seemed to be hours. She stayed home for the rest of the week after that, nearly breaking down at just the thought of having to go to school. She texted Kylie, asking if she was mad at her and got no response, simply left on read. Her dad seemed to not be happy about what happened, though he allowed her to stay home from school for the week, though he told her that she'd have to go back to school on Monday. The idea of going back to school filled her with dread, nearly throwing up from how stressed out and terrible she felt. She didn't want to go back, she didn't want to have to face the humiliation all over again, though it wasn't like she could stay home forever. She begged her dad to let her stay home longer or let her transfer to the school in the town next to hers, though it didn't seem like he was going to let her. Monday soon came around, and even though she didn't want to, she had to go to school, opting to walk instead of taking the bus. She soon approached the from of the school, despair filling her mind and body. There was no other choice but to accept this as her reality. She  _was a lesbian_ , and  **everyone knew.**


End file.
